When I was little and we lived near Jackson Hole, Wyoming (US), my dad would take us to climb the hill behind our house. I loved getting to spend time him and that "top of the world" feeling when we reached the summit. We'd look down at our house and he'd point out how far we'd come. After cancer, especially after the cardiac sarcoma, I wondered if I would ever get to experience that feeling again: climbing somewhere under your own power and getting to a summit with a gorgeous view.
Today, we climbed Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh all the way to the top -- 823' above sea level. It was HARD and I had to stop multiple times to take a hit off my inhaler, catch my breath, or get a drink of water. There are multiple routes to the summit and the trail we ended up on was not the "easy stroll" path I'd planned on. It was steep, rocky, and a near-constant climb the entire way. At the end of the trail, I was using my hands, too, as we scrambled up rocks. But the 360-degree view from the top and having that same feeling I'd had as a kid were both priceless.
Did I reach the summit as quickly as I'd like to? No. Did I do it as quickly as some of the other people on the trail? Negative. Did I carry my own supplies? Nope. Did it take me a year of weekly hikes and daily exercise to even attempt this hike? Yep. Does any of that matter? Not at all.
Here's the thing: I did it. I listened to my body and stopped when I needed to. I was also willing to end the hike at the first scenic view spot (maybe halfway up?) if I felt that any more would be too much for me. Kev carried my water, rain jacket, and other supplies and was super patient with my many stops. He also was fine if I felt we needed to turn back. Throughout the hike, his support and encouragement made such a huge difference.
Life is challenging after cancer treatment. For me, there is no "normal" and adjustments have to be made on a daily basis. These include when and how much I can eat and drink, my exercise regimen, the supplements I take, how much sleep I should get, etc. But that's okay. Things don't have to work the way they did before to be good. And today was a really, really good day.
So, to quote the movie Galaxy Quest, "Never give up; never surrender." Things may be really difficult right now and you may not feel like you're making any progress. But one of YOUR really, really good days could be just around the corner.
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